Inaugural Post/Introduction

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? … We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

- Akeelah and the Bee

Have you seen Akeelah and the Bee? It’s not really a popular movie, but it is by far one of my favorite movies. It’s about a little girl growing up in an area that isn’t particularly known for academic achievement. But, she has a proclivity and talent for spelling and makes it from her middle school to the national spelling bee stage. She’s an underdog, and it’s inspirational. The quote on the top is from a scene in the movie when her spelling coach is telling her if she wants to succeed, she will have to believe in herself. I guess I identify a lot with that instance, emotion, and struggle.

My parents emigrated from Taiwan when they were graduate students and have settled in the United States after their education in hopes of providing their children a better life than back home. My father has a Ph.D in petroleum engineering, and my mother has two master’s degrees herself. Education was highly valued in our family and growing up my parents instilled the notion that education is a worthy achievement. I’ve heard it is typical of most Asian families to push their children to achieve more than what the “American” schools teach, and my parents were no different. From an early age, they drilled me constantly on anything math related: multiplication tables, division, percentages, fractions, etc. They tried to teach me things that my teachers haven’t even covered, and didn’t cover for another year or two. I don’t know if it was because I was an indolent child, or perhaps just not as intellectual as they were hoping, but I couldn’t meet their expectations and failed miserably. The constant quizzings, and the abuse that surfaced had and still has to this day greatly traumatized me from anything math or science related.

Growing up I was interested in electronics, gadgets, and anything technologically related, but because of my childhood and the dearth of encouragement from my parents I never even thought I would have even a chance to hold a technical profession. So after high school I narrowed down my options to major in International Business for college. I graduated in 2007 and started working at an engineering firm in Southern California in contract management. The very first program I worked on was a DARPA program and a highly abstract idea just making it into fruition about fractionated satellites. I worked with engineers during the proposal phase and was just amazed and intrigued at the advanced concepts, designs and capabilities we (not me, but people around me at the time) possess to turn a novel idea into reality. I had always wanted to be an inventor and innovative products always interested me. In college I had a friend where we would think up of simple improvements to everyday objects but since it was so expensive to develop we never got anywhere. During my first year post-college, I entered into an invention competition for Every Edisons, a television show that selects a number of inventors and portrays the process of developing an invention from prototype to selling on a store shelf. My idea obviously wasn’t selected but that experience triggered a desire to learn more about materials, manufacturing, and how products are made. I remember driving down the freeway with my husband (I married at a young age) complaining that I don’t have the necessary skills to do what I would like to do. I distinctly remember him nonchalantly say, “Well why don’t you get an engineering degree and then you can accomplish what you want to?” At first I balked at his suggestion for all the years of being told I wasn’t bright enough to pursue this career had been deeply ingrained in my brain. Well, after much thinking and thinking I decided to do it. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do whether I consciously knew it or not, and I guess it’s better to try and fail rather than to never try at all.

After much research, I decided to pursue a 2^nd bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering. While researching and looking for others ‘like me’ I happened to come across a post that my blog partner (Laura) posted on a networking site. We got into contact and I’m glad to say we’ve been able to share our fears and hopes with each other throughout this scary, frustrating but hopefully rewarding ordeal. For me, the hardest issue to overcome (other than the multitude of math classes, and Physics, my nemesis!) is my confidence in myself, pushing aside all those accumulated years of self doubt. I guess I’m rambling too much for this first post, but if I do by a miracle complete this arduous task, I hope to end up in a biomedical/robotics industry creating nifty gadgets to improve the lives of those in third world countries, or even in 1^st world countries (if that’s even a term). I also hope to use my experience to help other girls who may have doubts about themselves to believe and just try, because you never know what may happen.

Outside of school and work (wait, I may be laid off soon!), I like to read, run, swim, play music and just veg out, although those stress relieving activities are quickly diminishing this semester with classes occupying most of my time.

Working part time and attending school full time in a world full of boys are sure to provide tons of blogging material especially in this economy so I hope you stay tuned to what we have to offer and share.

Hello, Nerd.

Welcome to the primary year of what could be the shortest blog ever if I win the lottery or decide to quit school. I'm one half of the blog duo that makes up Nice STEMs, a literary masterpiece about the journey of going back to school for mechanical engineering. For the sake of those who don't personally know me(or those who where thinking about the next episode of Gossip Girl when I was talking), here's an obligatory introduction(totally not brief):

I wasn't one of those kids who knew what the heck they wanted to be when they grew up. For a few years of my youth, this didn't faze me but by the time I was 12 years old I started stressing. Most of my early career choices revolved around being a teacher which I quickly ruled out since I couldn't quite envision myself teaching the very types of kids that made my life shall we say, less than pleasant.

In high school I took a denial approach and fell back on music as a career choice which worked up until senior year when I actually had to apply to college. I realized that a music major would land me right back in school as a music teacher leading some American Idol reject chorus(funny note, American Idol wasn't around when I was in HS). I needed a real job, so I went into radio.
--insert laugh here--

After completing almost 1.5 years at a liberal arts school, my parents pulled the plug. In short, they didn't feel like paying tuition for an arts major. Of course I was crushed. I completed my associate degree at a local community college and went on to demand much larger salaries as a result(har har).

A few years later, I was bitten by the automotive bug. Looking back it's pretty evident that I was into cars at a young age. I was always considered a tomboy; I played with Hot Wheels and begged to be taken to the go-kart track.

When I was 8 years old I remember my teacher asking the class, "If you could choose to stay the age you are forever would you and why?" I reasoned that I would want to get just old enough to get my driver's license. Then I could drive at the adult karting track that required them.

For whatever reason *cough* I'm a girl *cough* I was never encouraged to learn about cars. Attempts to convince my father that I wanted to learn how to drive stick shift or restore a GTO were brushed by the wayside.

That is, until I made friends with a car dude. My friend taught me how to drive stick and how to change tires among other tasks. Together we progressed (read:jumped head first) into a car project and actually emerged triumphant at the finale.

Long story short(er), I ended up going to a technical school(that shall remain nameless because it was a waste of $20K). I worked at dealerships for about 5 years in parts and service. And I always wanted to go back to school, but I was making pretty good money and didn't want to risk quitting my job.

Then I got laid off. School was calling. At first I decided to just go back for Journalism so I could become a respectable writer, not one of these internet know-it-alls called "bloggers". But the curriculum looked boring. The last thing I wanted to do was go sit with a bunch of 18 year olds in some lame Mass Communications class. I wanted a freakin challenge. However, I was(am) lazy and considered myself weak at mathematics.

At some point I grabbed my confidence and decided to pursue my passion. This was no short order given that everyone around me was negative about mechanical engineering, not the least of all, my parents who didn't hesitate to challenge my goal. Let me tell you, when you aren't personally 100% convinced of a particular path and you have little to no support, it's hard to commit. In short, it's discouraging(more on this later).

So now I'm in class part-time and set to go back full-time in the fall. It feels awesome(which I'm sure will change once I get into my 1st physics class). I can say that I'd like to be the next "Honda" in the future, but for now I'm just taking it one step at a time. Welcome to our engineering journey.